Tuesday, September 12, 2006

when panics attack

When I read the embassy news this AM and had subsequently heard from my friend N, I woke J-Dog up (at a completely reasonable hour, thank you) to tell him what happened. Calmly. Simply.

J-Dog get up and reads the web. States "Don't get all panicky. It was a couple of kids throwing rocks at a wall". I immediately had a vision of slamming his head into the counter. And I am not predisposed to violence. (Really)

I continued to get ready for work. But that kept rattling in my head; one, because I WAS NOT PANICKY, and two, because THAT RESPONSE SUCKED.

Here is the rest:
The One in the Right (me): That response was kind of dickheadish. I did not panick, and you invalidated my concerns by saying that.
him: What are you talking about?
me: I did NOT get all panicky. THIS is panicky. Proceed to mime a panic attack.
him: Is that panicked or orgasmic?
me: Dick
him: exactly what I am asking.
me: Simple validation about the welfare of our friend, and the simple fact that being in a new country and seperated from your children (who are in the welfare of someone you are just getting to know) would be a bit stressful.
him: still, no need to go overboard.
me: you know, 4 people were killed.
him: 3 of them were those rock throwing kids.
me: admit it, your response sucked
him: I am sorry my response appeared invalidating to your comments about this specific event.
me: mentally having that counter vision again, this time sharing it out loud.


We ended up laughing about it, especially when he asked me to repeat my panicked demonstration yet again, but it really made me think about a) why I care so much if my reaction is shared with others close to me, and b) why being mislabeled/interpreted/etc drives me up a fucking wall. Because, wow, baby, that makes me crazy.

1 comment:

Sudiegirl said...

Very good post...it really shows the differences between two people with regard to reactions (as in how they react).

Sorry that first sentence was so incoherent...I am not fully awake yet.

We're both bloggerchicks, so I just wanted to say howdy!

Sudiegirl