Tuesday, September 25, 2007

my heart is a lonely hunter

I haven't been able to visit much lately. I am still in the whirlwind of some extraordinary issues in my work and as such have been depleted, so utterly depleted. And I miss you so.

Tomorrow will be the most difficult day so far, and for all my cryptic comments I am unable to share more than this and I wish that wasn't the case. But I am pouring my heart out to you silently, pleading for safe harbor and a place to rest my head. And I could use a little wisdom to see me through.

And I'll go forward head up, as we are defined in the moments where we are forced to stand up the straightest, to open our hearts as fully as possible regardless of the ache. Because I want to look back on this one day and know I've done the best I could. And that this too shall pass.

I'll be around soon.

50 comments:

urban-urchin said...

good luck tomorrow. i hope you feel better soon honey- let us know if we can do anything...

s@bd said...

xo

thailandchani said...

Something tells me that you will know the right thing to do.. when the time comes to do it.



Peace,

~Chani
http://thailandgal.blogspot.com

Orangeblossoms said...

My heart beats with your heart.... I hold you in thought and prayer tomorrow.

liv said...

You know, I've thought of this often since my v. bad day in April. Pema Chodron says that something that comes out of hardship is being forced to be extremely present. I know that I ran any number of "story lines" for my life, but when I hit the skids, there was no option but to be here, right now. I know this doesn't seem like a comfort, but at some point there is the ability to see validity in the moment. hang on, sister. love to you.

something blue said...

I hope that things are okay and that Thursday comes quickly.

bgirl said...

thinking of you jen and sending you courage and steadiness during this challenging time.

though your details may come in later posts, just knowing you need a soft landing, is enough.

sending you a pillow, and wishes for the return of balance to your weary soul.

KC said...

Offering my shoulder, ears and open arms. I hope this burden is lifted soon. miss you xo

metro mama said...

Hang in there jen. Your strength and courage will see you through.

kgirl said...

don't know if i have much wisdom for you, but i'll send you all of my love and hugs.

Marymurtz said...

I wish you a peaceful and focused journey through whatever it is that is happening. Know my thoughts are with you, and when you're ready to talk on the other side of this, we'll be here.
Hugs,
Mary

Jennifer said...

Wishing you peace.

jennifer said...

You're not alone

PunditMom said...

Hang in there today. Sending you good thoughts.

Her Grace said...

Thinking of you...

crazymumma said...

You'll know.

I got a great strong shoulder here and a glass of wine waiting.

xo

Nancy said...

Thinking of you and wishing you peace today.

mitzh said...

Just wishing you all the best. Take care.

Kyla said...

I'm sorry, friend. Thinking of you today.

Magpie said...

All best winging towards you.

mamatulip said...

Thinking of you, sending strength and positivity.

Lawyer Mama said...

I'll be thinking of you today.

Persephone said...

Best of luck, my dear. I'll be thinking of you, too. Fingers, legs, arms crossed on your behalf.

Susanne said...

I hope that good vibes still can help.

(Hugs.)

slouching mom said...

Ah, darlin', that's one of my favorite books in the whole world.

Be strong.

We'll be here afterward.

xxoo

painted maypole said...

you have such a loving heart and reasonable head that whatever crud is thrown at you I have faith that you will handle it with more Grace than most. We are all standing here beside you, shoulder to shoulder, as you walk into whatever fire you face.

QT said...

Sending you nothing but the best, and a few words of wisdom -

We have to learn how to stay in a good yet unruly mood as we overthrow the cockeyed mass hallucination that is mistakenly referred to as reality.

"Maybe most importantly, we have to be ferociously and single-mindedly dedicated to the cause of beauty and truth and love even as we keep our imaginations wild and hungry and free. We have to be both disciplined and rowdy.

Your imagination is the single most important tool you have in your daily fight to be free. It is the source of every act of liberation you will ever need to pull off."

kiki said...

much love honey. feel my shoulder next to yours. xoxo

Bob said...

I don't have any wisdom to offer, but I do have the warmest regard for you and the confidence that you have it within yourself to deal with whatever today presents you.

take care.

flutter said...

feel my hand around yours? Your heart is not silent.

Oh, The Joys said...

jen,

As for the staff, they will land. Windows will open.

As for the residents...ack. I have just put my head on my desk too.

Love you,
J

Julie Pippert said...

We're here for you, and we've got your back. Think of us with you and feel stronger. You have all the P&PTs you need.

Julie
Using My Words

Mad Hatter said...

Love you.

Karen Forest said...

Thoughts and prayers to you and yours.....

Mrs. Chicky said...

Hope today isn't too hard for you, my friend.

ms chica said...

A blanket request for wisdom? I struggle daily. Follow your heart.

And you always welcome to rest at my place when you need some down time.

BOSSY said...

Gah, best wishes.

Redneck Mommy said...

I wish on a million stars that I could be there for you today when you got home.

My biggest, warmest wishes to you my dear friend.

Be well. I'm thinking of you.

Wayfarer Scientista said...

jen ~ my arms and heart go out to you. It's been tough around here too and it just got tougher. But hang in there. I'm here in silent solidarity.

ewe are here said...

I have no doubt that when all is said and done, you'll have done the very best you could and have much to be proud of.

No doubts.

Sending you peaceful thoughts.

Anjali said...

I'll be here when you return. Godspeed.

meno said...

If i had any useful wisdom, i would gladly send it to you.

I know you, i know you will do the best you can. And there is no more that can be done, by anyone.

<3

Tabba said...

i think it is safe to say that we have all locked arms across the nation - and around the world - to hold you up and to catch you when you land back here.

xoxo

Aliki2006 said...

Take your time. For yourself and for those you care about.

We'll be here!

nomotherearth said...

Best of luck. If anyone can manage a maelstrom, you can.

Casdok said...

You are strong

carrie said...

You've got lots of shoulders here if you need them. Please know that, and know that your best will be good enough.

Sending a hug.

Amy York said...

I know it's a bit late, but I hope it all went well... Thinking of you!

Amanda said...

Sending you memories of stopping on walks to pat moss, of little voices shushing you because the moss is sleeping and then asking to give you their birthday roses so you'll be happy.

I hope you can find respite from your burdens if only fleetingly, with moments of guileless wonder.

Little Monkies said...

Sister, so sorry to get to this late. My energy is with you. XOX.