Tuesday, September 18, 2007

pop goes the weasel

Our usual routine consists of me driving M to school (daycare) and dropping her off. When we got out of the car yesterday I reached down to hold out my hand and M says No Mom, I don't need to hold your hand anymore. I a big girl.

Whoa, M, what's with this Mom stuff. I am Mommy. Or Mama. I'm just not ready for Mom yet, it makes you sound too grown up. (coming from the woman who actually considered just having her call me Jen when the whole gig started).

I told you Mom, I a big girl now. Cackling wildly and seeming strangely taller all in one moment.

And oooof goes my heart.

44 comments:

Aliki2006 said...

Tessa likes to play around with calling me "Mom" but least for now I'm still Mama or Mommy.

They are tough--these rites of passage.

biodtl said...

My son (now almost 11) called me Mama for a long time, but my 3 year old daughter started with Mom early, and it killed me. I miss Mama!

Janet said...

Both of my older kids still call me Mommy (even when they are mad at me, but then it's "Mommmeeeee!"). But the little, little one? She calls me Mom.

Oooof, indeed.

capacious said...

My oldest is 10 and sometimes he still holds my hand without thinking. But if he sees another kid in the vicinity, he drops it like a hot potato, like "Holy smokes! Who put that thing in my hand?!". My 7-year-old boy doesn't mind hand-holding. But girls are so different, at least the ones I know, such independent little free-thinkers.

Both my boys still call me Mama and I hope they never, ever stop because I'll ALWAYS be their Mama. I think we have had occasional forays into Mom but it didn't stick. I hope it doesn't stick for you either.

mamatulip said...

I remember when Julia started calling me Mom...I sat her down and told her she couldn't call me Mom until she was eight. I said those were the rules.

She bought it. ;)

Sober Briquette said...

When I was about a teen, my mother told me I was old enough to call her "Mother" and that I should commence with it. She denies it now, but come on, why would I make that up? She always refers to her mother as "Mother," so it must have been her idea of a "tradition."

Fiona cloyingly calls me "Muzzy," but most of the time, I'm Mom.

slouching mom said...

Yes. Ooof. You reminded me of taking Ben to preschool (he was maybe four), and leaning down to kiss him goodbye, only to have him whisper to me, "Don't kiss me in front of everyone anymore, OK?"

Ouch.

painted maypole said...

oh! aren't you glad she calls you mommy (or even mom - ack!) instead of Jen? It is such a great title, and so sweet to hear it coming from your little one. You are her only Mommy, and it's a title worth relishing. I remember when MQ started saying "Mama" and it just warmed my heart every time. I try to remember that when she now bellows "mommy!!" whenever she needs something. ;)

Kyla said...

Ooof. Mama will resurface, I promise. But those first pushing aways are tough.

BubTar has been experimenting with "mother" lately...except he says, "Mudder." It cracks me up. He says, "Goodnight, Mudder." and requests that I reply, "Goodnight, Son."

kiki said...

everyday dude, this is my reality. you'll hear mama or mommy again too. and i'm cracking up with you wanting M to call you jen. smooches.

mayberry said...

I know! These big girls and boys are breaking our hearts.

crazymumma said...

..and in the next moment she will be sitting in your lap, sticky fingers tangled in your hair.

oof nonetheless.

Blog Antagonist said...

Wait until they ask you to drop them off at the corner. Dagger. To. The. Heart.

Beck said...

I'm still Mama around here, which is very Elvis of my kids.
The Baby has taken to telling people that she doesn't LIKE them, which would have ripped my heart RIGHT OUT, back when I just had the one. Now I'm like "Yeah, yeah. Get moving."

Tabba said...

Connor stopped calling me Mommy so long ago that i don't even know when it happened. and it was sort of heartbreaking...

Now, every picture he draws at school says, "Mom".

And I smile so big everytime he hands me his fistful of pictures that say "Mom".

Jennifer said...

Mom. Waaaa!

Lawyer Mama said...

Mom?

Nooooooo!

flutter said...

ooOOoOOf. and ouch, and yay! and jesus, I just don't know how any of you do it.

mitzh said...

If that day comes my heart will also surely break...

blooming desertpea said...

Hey MOM - your girl is a BIG girl now - lol!

Her Grace said...

They know exactly how to get us, don't they?

Mine played with Mom for a while, then went back to Mama or Mommy. Thank goodness.

Z said...

When my son was at primary school he liked me to crouch down as l left and kiss him through the railings. Lots of children joined him and there used to be a whole line-up of puckered lips, aged 4-9. That was nearly 15 years ago, probably wouldn't be allowed now.

nomotherearth said...

Too soon, too soon! I just got used to being called "mummy" and loving it. Tell me "mum" is not in my near future..We're making a big deal out of how the Boy is a Big Boy now, so he can make space for a Baby it when #2 comes.

carrie said...

Why can't kids come with a pause button?

It's nice to know I'm not alone!

Julie Pippert said...

Oh honey. (HUGS) to you for this and all that is coming. This age..it hit me like a freight train.

Julie
Using My Words

meno said...

Ouch.

Mine still likes to take my arm in parking lots and hang on me. I do not discourage this.

Christine said...

isn't it weird and slightly disconcerting to hear the word "mom?"

i'm still not used to it.

ms chica said...

Youch! Didn't see that one coming.

I'm 33, and I still say Mama. Of course when I discuss her with my sister she morfs into "your mother".

Pgoodness said...

ooof! I felt that, too!
M experimented with the mom thing, and still fits it in sometimes, but mostly it's mommy. I think it's just a little independence thing - she'll come back to mommy, don't worry.

Ally said...

Youch! The word "Mom" coming from such little lips is just wrong. Sometimes my girls call me Mom just to get my goat because they know I don't like it. I hope I'll always be Mama.

KC said...

Jolie's said "mom" before...felt jarred as you do. I think she heard it from other kids at school. It's totally freaky.

AmandaD said...

Funny how the milestone we are charged with helping them reach are the very things that seem to chip away at our souls.

Well done, mama.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

Wait until she starts school. And college. And graduates from grad school. Married.

Thank God for waterproof mascara.

urban-urchin said...

I know this oooof of which you speak...

My two year old tells me to "Go to work mommy" when he's mad at me or the even more soul crushing "Get out mommy? or Get out guy?" depending on if he's talking to me or my husband, to inform us that he doesn't want us he wants the other one.

The seven year old has asked me not to call her 'big girl' in public because you only call babies big girls.And please don't embarrass her by singing in front of her friends or making her give me one last kiss before she goes into school....

My heart is getting trampled on by BOTH progeny.

Hel said...

not the same thing but I am about to leave my three hounds at home with florian for two weeks without me and i've never done it before.

i worry

bgirl said...

oh..i hear you, the other day we woke up and my little dude's first words were not "good morning mama" or "hi mama"

oh no,instead it was "is it a nanny day? where is she? is she here yet?"

oooof...right there with ya.

Mrs. Chicken said...

The Poo doesn't cry when I leave her at her new school. In fact, I think it bugs the crap out of her when I linger.

And she consistently calls me "mudder."

*sigh*

Persephone said...

My mom still insists that I call her "mama." And I'm 31.

QT said...

I wasn't allowed to call my mother "Mom" for a long time - I think until I was 10 or 11 years old. Being the oldest, I think she tried to postpone the inevitable.

In many latin american countries, mothers have pet names as a sign of affection. Maybe you could make it into a game somehow and introduce a new pet name for yourself.

Aren't you glad you didn't start the Jen thing??

NotSoSage said...

Oh, I'm getting "Mom" lately, too. I haven't said anything, but Joe will watch my face drop and remind her that I would like to be called Mama. I'm cool with first names, though...in fact, better that than "Mom", I think...

Sigh.

Amy York said...

Oh I remember that day...
Ouch.
I suppose it's bound to happen eventually... With us, once I became Mom to one, the younger quickly followed suit.
Unless they are sick... then I'll always be Mommy.
Or when they want something. ;)
Lil stinkers know what gets us.

Oh, The Joys said...

I bet that big kid love is much harder won and that much sweeter. At least I hope.

Magpie said...

big kid today, little kid tomorrow, baby snuggling when it's convenient. but, yes, they get older. sniff.

Susanne said...

I'm forever amazed that I'm so sensitive to things like that. I positively hate it when my son calls me "Mami" (which is what all the other children are doing with their mothers here) and I insist on "Mama".

It shouldn't matter but somehow it does. But now I can relate to my mother who told me not to call her by her first name. (I felt so grown-up at the ripe old age of 12.) She said, "You and your sister are the only people in the world who can call me Mama." and she's right.