Saturday, December 22, 2007

we'll see

There were four of them spaced somewhat evenly around the grocery store entrance this morning as I went in to buy a few things for a party I am already fairly sure we will not end up attending. Guys, I say. Hey. You staying at the _________. (It's winter, it's cold, and they are in the same city as the temporary winter program and I know they know about it because at least one of them looks familiar). Speaken Dutch? or something similar, one guy replies. Are you messing with me, dude? Cause if you are I'll keep walking. Wait a minute he says, english perfect and if I'm not mistaken a bit of a southern twang, so I smile and say It's going to be cold tonight, really cold. I work with the people over there and like it or not, you can all stay there if you want to. Think about it and I'll stop by on my way out. One of them tells me they need $150 for a place but it's in a city I am not sure how to help with, so I need a few minutes to think.

M spent the night puking, sometimes all over me. I'm exhausted and sort of annoyed, my too small house has extra family in it right now, everyone wants to help, bless them, but I just want to be left alone. Ho, Ho, Ho, to me. So I finish my shopping and grab some deli sandwiches for the guys (and one woman) outside.

I've racked my brain, I can't help with the $150. If it was in another city, I'd know of a place who could help. It's alright, thank you for at least thinking about it, the guy sitting with the fake Dutch guy replied. I'm still not too keen on the fake Dutch guy but I also know it doesn't really matter in the end. The woman tells me they've stayed at the program and they can stay there again, it's a bit of a walk but they'll probably end up doing just that. They ask if they can have a bed for certain and I tell them yes because I know it's true. When it's this cold we'll pack them in if we have to. I hand them the sandwiches because even if some of them are hustling there's no free meals till dinner on a Saturday. Now we are all friends, me and these guys who've moved a bit closer while everyone entering the store gives us wide berth. I wonder what those folks think, me and a group of guys shooting the shit, the Please Help, I'm homeless and hungry sign at our feet.

I don't have much more to say, I'm still tired and still annoyed. I tell them again how cold it's going to be and that I hope they take care and take me up on my offer. I mention I have a sick kid and two of them wish her well. How old is she, the woman asks and I tell her. It's hard on the little ones she says. I hope you have a Merry Christmas. I am always touched by moments like this, blessings from the poor that are hard to accept and still feel okay about walking away.

19 comments:

flutter said...

The blessings are the gifts that the poor have to give. It is nothing short of divine to accept.

kristen said...

i love flutter's comment.

i'm sorry M's still sick and if i lived closer, i'd come whisk you away for a drink (or three) so you could have some space in my company. xo

Suz said...

We're about to experience the crowded house and the to-closeness of family tomorrow. Ho ho ho.

Amy Y said...

I'm not feeling too Ho HO Ho today either... Hope tomorrow is a lil better for both of us and especially hope that M is better and that the houseguests are gone soon. I like having family in town but love when they go, too.

Redneck Mommy said...

Having a hard time mustering up the merry spirit myself.

Hoping it will find it's way to me once again so I can feel the joy of the season...

smooches.

Pgoodness said...

I hope you really, really realize how amazing you are and how much you do for the people you meet.
And yeah, what Flutter said.
:-)

Mrs. Chicky said...

You sound tired, hon. I hope you find your peace.

painted maypole said...

if a blessing is all a person has to give, we must accept it graciously and thankfully, I think. They want, and deserve, to be able to give you something in return.

mamatulip said...

You do sound tired.

Peace to you. And to M. I hope she's feeling better soon.

patches said...

We have so much to learn from each other.

Hope M. feels better soon.

Kyla said...

Flutter said it so well.

I hope your sweet M feels better.

Julie Pippert said...

I'm sorry M is sick and your space offers you no succor now. But how like you, anyway, in the midst of this, to reach out a hand to others.

Happy Holidays to you.

Julie
Using My Words

Family Adventure said...

Oh, Jen, you sound a little overwhelmed. I hope M feels better soon.

And that they made it to the shelter OK.

Heidi

meno said...

You continue to amaze me.

adam brown said...

hello, i emailed you but got an error. anyway here's the reg cleaner i uses, this shit is good, don't stay without protection!

hele said...

I see adam discovered you as well. He was kind enough to pass on some valuable information on firming up my abs. I suspect it is a sign that I should join an exercise class. Maybe the gods are trying to tell you to do your laundry??

Or maybe it is a coded message that you should immediatly hop on a plane and come for a visit.

carrie said...

I love how you are able to break through to people. You have such a gift.

ps. I hope M feels better soon!

And, hope your Holiday is happy!

KC said...

Merry Christmas- peace and joy always, love you.

Andrew said...

Merry Christmas Jen! I so have been enjoying your blog and I appreciate what you do for the downtrodden of us. Have a Happy Holidays and a Merry Christmas. And don't ever give up blogging. I hope to hear all about Christmas at the shelter. I hope it is/was grand!