Sunday, January 18, 2009

flight

I know what you are thinking.  Girl's unemployed now.  She should have all the time in the world for blogging activities.  It's funny how untrue that is. Emptying one's entire house borders on the insane, no matter that each obstacle on the list continues to find resolution.  Take yesterday's garage sale for example.  I'm sitting on the lawn on top of my child's bed.  Folks want to buy the bed and that's good.  But for some reason I can't get up.  M brings me a cookie, she's tireless like that, she's always trying to make her own nickel off of the garage salers and usually they are suckers for her but I'm not paying. I bought the damn cookies after all. So I got off the bed and helped load it into someone's truck.  

Last night my friends took me out for a rousing dinner filled with fancy drinks.  After my second pear infused mojito I veered into maudlin.  There are no pear infused mojitos in the jungle.  Not yet anyways.

For the first time in my adult life I am unemployed. In fact, no one in my house is employed unless you count the cookie sales.  You guys are the one constant.  I'm not saying that to you know, pressure you.  I'm just saying it because it's true.  Tuesday I sell my car, Wednesday means the rest of our furniture heads out the door and off to a family who has finally found a place to live after a long time.  That part feels good. But still.  

All in all it's rather surreal.  I came home Friday boohooing like a baby. I kept crying all night. But that night I had a dream, a dream I've never had before.  In my dream I was flying and once I figured out how to do it I couldn't believe how fast I could go.


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21 comments:

Kyla said...

You can do it, jen. Fast and free.

Amber said...

The sad part of new beginnings is that there's always an ending first. Even if you're ready for it, even if you want it, it's hard.

And I love that your kid is selling cookies. How enterprising!

alejna said...

I'm so excited for you. You guys are really doing an amazing thing.

Indigo said...

May you always soar with the wind beneath your wings dear friend! (Hugs)Indigo

flutter said...

you can fly like no one I have ever known

motherbumper said...

You are free and seriously woman, that is something I wish I had the kahunas to do to.

meno said...

I think you are going to invent a bicycle-powered blender and introduce Pear-infused Mojitos to many new people.

It is your destiny.

Indigo Virgo said...

oh, those flying dreams are addictive.

Cold Spaghetti said...

I am so impressed with how you approach this huge transition with such grace and humility. I'm awed, inspired, and so, so, SO thrilled for you!

carrie said...

I dream of flying too. But you're really doing it.

Mad said...

It must be excruciatingly difficult and freeing all at once. Your work was so much a part of your identity that you must me checking every now and then to make sure both your arms are still there.

painted maypole said...

flying. i love it.

patches said...

Flying dreams are my favorite, but flying with a pear infused mojito might be my new favorite.

kgirl said...

I'm scared and excited for you, but right now I mostly can't get over the fact that you were able to have a garage sale in January.

Redneck Mommy said...

You are my hero.

Truer words have never been spoken.

I love you.

KC said...

xoxo sister

I hope it is your dream.

mamatulip said...

Oh my god, Jen.

This is so amazing.

Magpie said...

So damned exciting.

crazymumma said...

darling. all you have to do is open those wings. Look down, see? There is a huge safety net.

Now go. Fly.

Janet said...

I can't believe it's almost here. Smooth landing, friend.

honeypiehorse said...

I came late to the conversation and wonder where you're going but found this very moving anyway.